Home for busy women | Official Blog of "The Get A Life Campaign"

Sometimes you have to laugh

2008-08-28T01:05:00.002-04:00

When life is no joke, and you haven't cracked a smile in a while, sometimes you can become your own punch line...

I worked the night shift (7pm to 7am) all last week, which means sleeping during the day. So, one particular day, I set my alarm and fell asleep around 9am, while watching Charmed (save the comments, I still love that show). I wake up later on, before my alarm clock, and I look at clock: 9:39am.

I felt surprisingly rested... I had to have slept more than 39 minutes. I look at the TV: Charmed is still on. I am now utterly confused. I look at the window: the sun is still out. Is this what a power nap feels like??

Absolutely not.

The source of my temporary insanity? I had reset the time on the clock when I meant to set the alarm. And Charmed? Well, it runs at 8am, 9am, 4pm and 5pm on weekdays.

It was definitely jokes on me.

... it's a good thing I woke up when I did, or I would have overslept! It was really 5:48pm.

Dr. Ty
From the GAL Blog
www.getalifecampaign.com

Otherwise Known As Ty The Great

2008-08-08T07:16:00.006-04:00

I took my (3rd favorite) shortcut from New Jersey to Connecticut earlier this week to avoid the George-Washington-Bridge-Sunday-night-northbound-nightmare. My detour took me up Palisades Parkway and onto I-287 East, which passes by a town called Tarrytown.

Yes, I've taken this extended route at least 11 times since I first left for college in Boston over a decade ago. But, this night, the only person awake in the car, I really noticed the sign for Tarrytown, and it forced me to remember the first time I had ever heard of such a town...

JUDY BLUME'S "OTHERWISE KNOWN AS SHEILA THE GREAT"

What a great book. My heart skipped a beat remembering how fun her books were. I had never been to Tarrytown (still haven't). I had hardly left the state of New Jersey back then.

As a pre-teen, I vividly dreamed of all the towns described in Blume's books, in the Babysitter's Club series, and Nancy Drew novels. I lived vicariously through these characters. I vowed that when I was older that I would visit all of these really cool places. Clearly, it was the beginning of my insane addiction to traveling (not to mention that The Babysitter's Club was to the pre-teen me what SATC is to me now).

But, Judy Blume's book was the first. I remember thinking, wow, Tarrytown is just in New York, it's SO close to me, yet it sounds like a totally different reality. Maybe one of these trips, I'll have to carve out time to stop and see if it lives up to my 9-year-old expectations.

What books are imprinted in your memories? Which books did you read during the pre-teen years that made you want to be something extraordinary (or weird), visit a certain place, fuel your love of reading, or have characters who you still remember?

Just a shout for Blume's other books I can still remember plots of: Are You There God? It's Me, Margaret, Tales of a Fourth Grade Nothing and Freckle Juice. And one NON-Blume book: Freaky Friday, which made a comeback in 2003 with Jamie Curtis and Lindsay Lohan. I still think the idea was SO clever!

Ahh... to read like a kid again...

Dr. Ty
From the GAL Blog
www.getalifecampaign.com
Please leave comments here.

From narcoleptic to insomniac

2008-08-07T02:00:00.000-04:00

For the 4th night in a row, I can't fall asleep before 2am.

I'm used to being an insomniac... I can remember laying in bed as early as grammar school, watching the sun rise without so much as a wink of sleep all night.

But, my surgical ICU schedule last month made it very easy to fall asleep. Working 30 hours virtually every other day, with half days of work in between... not to mention picking up the munchkin by 6pm during the other two days. No sleep issues then.

Once the adrenaline of that schedule wore off, I crashed even harder. I finished my bid 2 days before my birthday. Purposely avoiding anything requiring major planning, a quiet weekend in some random town in New Hampshire sounded wonderful. Too bad my weekend is a blur of naps, food poisoning, and more naps.

The nice gazebo overlooking the inn's garden? Admired it through the backs of my eyelids. The boat cruise along Portsmouth Harbor and the Isles of Shoales? Snoozed. Any beautiful, quiet, relaxing moment? NAP time! I couldn't fight those heavy lids to save my life. Hours of my life gone, with only periodic awakenings filled with guilt about sleeping my birthday weekend away.

Oh well. It was relaxing.

So, I must have used up all of my sleep hours for the rest of the year. Because, now I'm struggling.

Maybe I need a little more narcoleptic New Hampshire in my life.

My favorite pic from the weekend...
found on the side of a random back road with no humans in site:

In case you can't see, it says: "Lettuce $1.00"

I definitely need more New Hampshire in my life.

Dr. Ty
From the GAL Blog
www.getalifecampaign.com

More things I don't have time for...

2008-08-06T00:48:00.001-04:00

Why is it that when you have a "day off," you spend it with timesuckers (like various customer service agents just to fix one simple issue_?

My initial issue: My Sprint Treo 700p wouldn't charge without hanging the phone upside down or suspending the cord at just the right angle (aka "jimmying it").

The solution: Call Sprint. Not only have I paid monthly for that Sprint phone insurance for the last 10 years... the phone is within warranty.

What I did: Instead of calling the insurance as usual, I used the Sprint Self-service ONLINE replacement form (advertised as "save time").

What happened: The Treo 700p was out of stock, so a Palm Centro arrived. With no battery or charger.

What I did: Called Sprint to ask them if this was some sort of sick joke (nicely, of course).

What happened: A nice, clueless representative had no idea that this self-service option existed, and didn't know who sent me the phone. So she couldn't get them to get me a battery. She went away for some time, did some research and promised that she'd call me back after she ordered my new battery. She never called.

What came in the mail: Not one, not two, but THREE Sprint boxes!

What was inside said boxes: Yes, more phones WITHOUT batteries!

To make a long story short... after 7 hours of one-on-one quality time with various Sprint representatives, being transferred to literally every department within Sprint, coupled with many expressions of "I'm not sure how this happened," or "I don't know how to get you a battery," "I still can't figure out who sent you all these phones," or, "Of course ma'am, please hold..." followed by a click, hold music, and a new, unsuspecting person... I found two helpful people. Just two. Out of at least 25 people. Seriously.

The first conferenced me with accessory sales to purchase the battery and charger and immediately credited my account for it. HOWEVER, the order that arrived included:

TWO chargers, and ZERO batteries!
(See earlier comment about sick joke)

In case I lost you, here's the tally at this point: Nine days later... FOUR replacement phones, TWO chargers, ONE cover to fit the extended battery... wait... what battery? That's right: STILL, no battery.

More hours of wasted time later, after being deliberately hung up on by a very friendly associate, after having my pleads for a supervisor repeatedly ignored because EVERY associate thinks she or he can handle this (for some reason) complicated situation.... again, I find someone who has a brain inside his skull and figures out a way to send me the product I ordered. Thanks M.J.!

So today, for the first time since the order was first placed on July 22nd, I have a functional cell phone.

(For brevity, I left out that M.J. sent the new order to the wrong address, but in his defense, he had UPS redirect it to the right one 5 minutes after I called him. It arrived on Monday. But, Sprint was upgrading their system all day Monday, so I had to wait until Tuesday to activate it).

I'm convinced it's me. It has to be. This is the story of my life.

I am a walking customer service nightmare.

Dr. Ty
From the GAL Blog
www.getalifecampaign.com

Takes a lickin' and keeps on tickin'

2008-07-29T06:00:00.000-04:00

During my son's usual flips, jumps and turns around the living room last week, I heard a loud thump. I waited patiently for the cry, but only whimpers followed.

I yell: "Honey, what did you hurt?"

Him: "The wall."

He then walks into the kitchen rubbing his clearly injured elbow.

The moral of this story? Just as we feel like life is beating the crap out of us, maybe we're secretly kicking life right back. Sometimes it takes a 3-year-old to put that in perspective.

My hiatus? I've been working 30 hour shifts essentially every other day. There's just not that much energy in the world. But, it's over now... and I'm much like Timex.

Dr. Ty
From the GAL Blog
www.getalifecampaign.com

What I've had my nose in lately

2008-07-10T15:15:00.001-04:00

Set a goal or else time escapes you.

In order to keep myself accountable to my reading goals for the year, I'm sharing them with you guys.

Prior to fall 2006 (when GAL was born), I only read nonfiction (political, psychological philosophical-type books) and textbooks until my GAL pal Nakia disapprovingly eyed my bookshelf, declared that I was boring (gasp), and prescribed more fiction for my ailment.

I started with The Heiress of Water and I've been hooked ever since. I used to read a ton of fiction as a kid, but somewhere I think I became too "serious" for that. Truly, letting yourself get taken away to some far away world is so relaxing.

So -- Stop making excuses! Even if you read ONE page, it's one page closer to finishing, and one additional page of fun.

2008 TALLY

READ SO FAR:
The Alchemist
Harry Potter and the Prizoner of Azkaban
Being In Love by Osho

To be read before September 30:
Jesus Land: A Memoir
Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire

To read by the end of the year:

The Memory Keeper's Daughter
On Writing by Stephen King
Just Too Good to Be True by E. Lynn Harris (comes out July 15th... pre-ordered a copy months ago)

Now that's I've posted this here, you all have to hold me to it. Feel free to share your reading tally for '08. For my GALs who spend a lot of time in the car...

How do you feel about fiction on audio CD?

I also noticed that when I consciously turn off my laptop, it's so much easier for me to read for leisure. Being on the computer zaps so much of my time! Try it tonight. Decide that you'll cut it off 2 hours earlier than usual. Let me know what happens.

Dr. Ty
From the GAL Blog
Haven't read "The Get A Life Campaign?" get your copy!

I'm Hot...

2008-07-03T16:37:00.001-04:00

Not J. Lo sexy, hot. Or hot like those new Prada shoes on sale. Not hot, like an old lady's stolen purse. I'm not hot on anyone's trail (not yet). Nor would the spice of a jalapeño describe my present demeanor.

I'm literally hot, as in --

hot adj
1. Having or giving off heat; capable of burning.
2. Being at a high temperature.

Why, do you ask, am I so HOT? Well, picture 90-degree summer weather, coupled with an air conditioning unit that can't be turned on because it floods the basement. Enter a landlady who doesn't call me back, and screens that are still in her possession awaiting replacement (i.e., not in the windows).

That equals a) an actual, real-life sweat box, unable to get a lick of fresh air; or b) fresh air at the cost of living in co-habitation with 45 different species of bugs, vying to get inside my nice cozy abode.

This month, I am working in the surgical intensive care unit with 80-hour workweeks, caring for patients 30 straight hours at a time -- with only one day off in every seven -- plus picking up, dropping off, and caring for my toddler. So, the fact that I also have to schedule thrice daily phone calls trying to track her down with NO response is just too much for me to handle right now.

Which then led me to be:

hot adj
1. Marked by intensity of emotion; ardent or fiery: a hot temper.

I feel as though a back-link to a post from last summer is appropriate right now: When Mean People Make It Hard To Smile.

As Zen-like as us GALs try to be - nice, calm, positive energy-bringing, it never fails that we are PUSHED, KICKED or BEATEN to the limit. Ugh. Pass the ice.

In an effort to cheer my-sweaty-self up, I couldn't resist playing a couple o' beats:

Dr. Ty
From the GAL Blog
www.getalifecampaign.com

What to do with your old cell phones

2008-06-28T15:07:00.002-04:00

Unless you're like me -- someone who breaks most electronics and rides things out until they fray at the edges -- I found a great place to send your used cell phones after you upgrade.

www.cellphonesforsoldiers.com

The Cell Phones for Soldiers program was started in April 2004 by 13-year-old Brittany Bergquist and her 12-year-old brother Robbie of Norwell, Massachusetts.

Robbie and Brittany's goal is to help our soldiers serving overseas call home. They hope to provide as many soldiers as possible with prepaid calling cards. Through generous donations and the recycling of used cell phones, Robbie and Brittany have already distributed thousands of calling cards to soldiers around the globe.

Check it out! You can print a pre-stamped mailing label right from the website -- quick and easy.

Dr. Ty
From the GAL Blog
www.getalifecampaign.com

How to beat your to do lists

2008-06-25T20:50:00.005-04:00

I cleaned out ONE of my bags today and found not one, not two, but four to do lists from the last week. At least three of them had the same items listed. So, did I not remember what I wrote the day before? Could I not find the list from the day before? Or am I just loca in the cabeza?

While many folks who know me would mark a huge "X" next to the latter, I decided that it was (again) a reflection of my need for organization.

I bought a project planning notebook in an effort to keep ALL of my daily to do lists in the same place. So, I can just refer to the day before rather than having to rewrite them on napkins, backs of prescriptions, or my hand! It also helps me outline long term projects.

For example, I am writing four textbook chapters that are due in July. I have another due in the fall. I have association memberships to renew soon, home projects to complete, and paperwork to file for the munchkin to start public school Pre-K.

So, instead of putting all of those things on today's to do list (and give myself palpations), I make today's MUST DO list. The ongoing stuff is usually on an ONGOING to do list. Each major category has its own page where I put everything -- phone numbers, important dates/times, and to do items. That way, it looks manageable to me.

[NOTE: A regular notebook would work as well. I bought a project planning notebook because the paper is a little thicker, there are numbers along the edge and... what the heck, the real reason is that I am an admitted stationery freak. So, do yourself a favor, get a 99 cent spiral notebook and go about your planning!]

As an aside, my 3-year-old is in a phase that makes me want to auction him off to the highest bidder at least once every four days. But, I woke up this morning, found this midget in my bed (he must have sneaked in while I was knocked out), and I remembered how cute he can really be. During this rare opportunity for observation (without him speeding past me or jumping off of some tall object), I realized that his feet are HUGE. I put the cordless phone next to his foot for effect... he's only 3. Maybe I should start being nicer to him now.

P.S. Want to win a ROOM MAKEOVER? Enter the Cookie Magazine sweepstakes!

Dr. Ty
From the GAL Blog
www.getalifecampaign.com

My new budgeting technique!

2008-06-18T21:14:00.005-04:00

In the spirit of my newfound organization (and new workspace), I have been getting everything in order -- including the finances.

Now that I get paid every two weeks, the budgeting month to month wasn't working. Some months are two checks, others three checks. Sometimes I ran out of money before the month was up.

Instead, it made much more sense to budget paycheck to paycheck. So, basically, for each payday, I decide what bills fall from that date until the next payday.

Here's an example I made to show what I mean.

Paydays are at the top. My expenses are listed in order of due date. And the amounts for each are listed under the appropriate date. It helps me see how negative or positive I will be for each pay period.

I use google documents because I can check it from anywhere, anytime. It's working well so far.

What's your budgeting techniques? What works for you? Do you use Excel? A checkbook register? Quicken?

Dr. Ty
From the GAL Blog
www.getalifecampaign.com

An Attempt at Organization... success!

2008-06-17T09:42:00.002-04:00

If you've read my book, my blog, or listened to me talk -- you know that I hate cleaning and organizing. I absolutely love a clean, organized home, but the processing is so daunting.

Well -- I attacked a corner in my room that has been glaring at me since we moved. This is the best that it's looked over the last 11 months (I know you love those strategically-placed pink flowers back there).

Welcome to my office.

I could not find a simple desk I liked. We had boxes and boxes of office supplies and book promo stuff, then work took over and added to the stacks.

"Work In Progress"

My master plans...

So, 4 garbage bags, a trip to Target and Ikea, and 2 days later, here's my corner!

Such a great way to start the week! Continue rutbreaking, ladies...

Dr. Ty
From the GAL Blog
www.getalifecampaign.com

The Art of Color

2008-06-16T07:31:00.003-04:00

It's a proven fact that bright or soothing colors in a room can brighten your mood -- well, today, my proposition is that COLORING brightens your mood.

Even if you are childless, get out your watercolors or crayons and get to work! After a while, it becomes mindless, and relaxing. I think it's akin to meditating in some ways. All of your other senses are turned off and it's just you and the decision between aquamarine and turquoise.

One of my closest girlfriends and I used to buy coloring books in college when we were stressed out. It seemed goofy at the time, but maybe we were on to something.

For Father's Day, the lil' man and I made a watercolor Picasso as a present, and I really did feel calmer... I'll be looking out for your Picassos soon!

Dr. Ty
From the GAL Blog
www.getalifecampaign.com

Take the GAL Survey & Win!

2008-06-13T12:26:00.004-04:00

Happy Friday everyone!

I need your help. I'm working on a few projects to expand "The Get A Life Campaign."

Please give me your feedback asap in the GAL reader survey. The survey takes less than 4 minutes (yes, I timed it).

AND THE BEST PART -- I'm raffling off a gift basket and a free autographed copy to one lucky survey submitter.

Your responses will be separated from your email address, so please be honest!

If you know someone else who read the book, please send them the link as well.

Thanks in advance -- and keep posting!

If you have trouble clicking the link, copy and paste this:
http://www.surveymonkey.com/s.aspx?sm=91S8iLDgW3KTvR9CPB1kgg_3d_3d

Dr. Ty
From the GAL Blog
www.getalifecampaign.com

Does customer service still exist?

2008-06-12T09:15:00.003-04:00

The last thing I ever want to do with my last nugget of free time is fight with customer service. I feel like it's all I do nowadays between the new car, the car accident, and Sprint's auto debit snafu that resulted in multiple bank fees.

Yesterday, all I wanted was to pick up my license plates and ask a few questions -- that's it. This week alone, according to my call log, I called the dealership a total of 14 times. Most of those calls, I was directly transferred into someone's voice mail. They were nice enough to vary in whose voice mail boxes I landed. I kept calling back to possibly find someone with a pulse to answer my simple questions (of course, the operator is in a different building, so she doesn't know who's here or not.... please hold. click. ring. automated voice mail).

Now, I'm on a first-name basis with operators Karen and Cory (What's up guys? I miss you already), and it still got me nowhere. I missed one call from Mr. Salesman. Called right back. Left voice mail. Never heard a peep.

Clearly, I ignored my own rule #4 in "How Busy Women Can Stop Losing Money," and really should have just asked to speak to the manager. In my defense, I was trying not to be so mean and pushy, thinking if I could just reach lifeforms on the other end, the problem was really easy to solve.

Well, today, I got a manager -- the manager -- on the phone and he wasn't interested in my frustrating week in the least. In fact, he explained how terribly busy he was, and he'd call me back in 15 minutes. Fifteen turned into 45 and, fed up, I asked my mom to go in person and pick up the goods while I was at work. After he handed them over, she informed him that I still have not had my questions answered. He (again) said he didn't have time. He had customers. He'd call me in 15 minutes.

An hour later he called. He wasn't friendly. But, by then, I had already opened the Purchase and Delivery Satisfaction Survey email in my inbox (vengeance!) so my anger had decreased. I reiterated my frustrations on the phone, asked my questions (one of which he couldn't answer) and then he offered me free service on the first maintenance. Thanks, bud. Too bad, I never want to do business with you again.

Seriously, don't do me any favors. How about just doing your job?

I don't get it.

If you don't like animals, don't become a vet. If you don't like talking to people, fielding complaints, making people feel satisfied, then guess what? Don't pick a career where you have to talk to people, field complaints, and make them feel satisfied. Am I missing something?

Speaking of car buying, I found this really detailed site on Top 10 Car Dealer Scams. The author sounds even more pissed off than I was today. So, try to take the information in context.

My favorite part came before the scam info:

Funny one liners salespeople like to use on you. Did they take the same sales training course?

"You're stealing food from my baby's mouth"
"Everybody pays this fee"
"We're losing our shirt on this deal"
"The web sites you got the prices from are wrong."
"This car won't be here tomorrow"
"The bank requires you to buy the extended warranty to get loan approval"
"Do you want the car? What will it take to make you sign today?"

I highlighted the ones attempted on me in red.

Not to mention --

Mr. Salesman: Just think about how you'll feel in that car...

Me: You don't have to sell me the car. I like the car already. I want you to get this monthly payment down. I wanna talk numbers.

Mr. Salesman: Well, I don't sell numbers, I sell cars.

Genius. Is there a way to buy a new car and never ever have to talk to car salesmen again in life... ever? Let me know.

Is there a such thing as customer service nowadays? No one from the dealership even called any time in the last three weeks to see if I was happy with such a large purchase (If they had, they would have found out about the brand new engine going out on me). Ugh.

The most disgusting part, is that we waste precious ME time talking to these knuckleheads, then we're too pissed off to do anything constructive.

Sigh - I think I feel a lil' bit better now.

Dr. Ty
From the GAL Blog
www.getalifecampaign.com

Rutbreakers #3: Or-gan-ize

2008-06-11T11:07:00.000-04:00

SIGH. I have been "spring cleaning" for more than two weeks now and I still have pockets of clutter staring at me. And it's worse now, because I've pulled all the clutter out of their neat hiding places and the junk is front and center -- making an obstacle course of the floor in my bedroom.

Why am I doing this?

I function SO much better when things are well-organized.
I don't want my son to inherit my cleaning habits.
I accumulate so much paper from work that I'm afraid it will take over the house if I don't find them a home.
I hate not being able to find stuff.
My rut is usually exponentially related to my mess at home.
Mom would be proud.

But, why, why, why is it so hard?

Aside from the simple lack of time, I find myself choosing between organizing and cleaning up our new messes (Cheerios from a certain toddler's breakfast, laundry/dishes from the past week). I can't keep up. The concept of pulling everything out, going through it, and putting it back in a way that makes sense is daunting. Sigh...

So, like all things I don't do well, I read about it.

Better Homes & Garden has tons of tips on how to organize most things. My favorite printed source is Real Simple.

Better Homes & Garden also has a quiz to help you learn your organizational style. My results were quite informative. It may help you get over your cleaning hump as well.

Help me! Give me your tips... And to those who are in the boat with me, good freaking luck.

Dr. Ty
From the GAL Blog
www.getalifecampaign.com

Tuesday's Tip: Travel with small kids

2008-06-10T12:00:00.003-04:00

My son flew on more than a dozen round trip flights before he turned three. Last spring, he and I ventured to Chicago from Newark lugging two large suitcases, a car seat inside of a bag full of even more stuff, my carry-on tote bag, his stroller – and oh yea, my 2-year-old son weighing in at 30-plus pounds. It was an interesting trip to say the least.

It was on the flight home that I began cussing myself out, I mean, penning these tips so you can learn from mistakes. Bookmark these for your next trip with your kid, niece, nephew, cousin or godchild:

* Come prepared. Pack enough essentials (diapers, wipes, food, etc) for at least 8 hours, just in case the flight gets delayed.
* Bring a change of clothes for both of you in your carry on. I have already been pooped on, peed on and puked on in the traveling process. I know, so sexy!
* Bring his favorite (silent) toy, a portable dvd player with headphones or a book.
* Pack juices in sippy cups. Depending on the TSA agent, they may not let you bring anything else through without some 'splaining. I had to throw out a bottle of water (unopened) despite my attempts to tell Mr. TSA that I dilute my son’s juice with water. Jerk.
* Bring lots of his favorite snacks. There might be some bribing going on.
* Have good timing. Schedule your flights around nap time or keep him awake until you get on the plane (if you can).
* Get a carseat cover (from Babies R Us). It makes checking the car seat easier, and cleaner. Plus, you can throw clothes and toys in the bag as well.
* Use curbside check-in. The extra bucks are worth it when your hands are full.
* Don’t check the stroller. Bring the stroller all the way to the gate (the tiny umbrella type), no matter how much she says she wants to walk (or how light you think she is)
* Be prepared: They may have him walk through security on his own. But, he might like it.
* Don’t rush. Even though the announcement will say that anyone with small children can get on first, wait until the very end. Time to get settled sounds great, but it’s easier to let him crawl or run around in the waiting area than in a tiny airplane row. It buys you more time before meltdown.
* Make friends with the flight attendants when you walk on. Let them ooh and ahh. You might need them later. Also make friends with your seatmates, they can help entertain sometimes. One trip, my son talked this one guy's ear off up until naptime. Lovely.
* Sit wisely. DO NOT sit in the bulkhead seats. Yes... it's relieving to know he can’t kick the seat in front of you, but if you need something from your bags during take off (for example, if he pukes all over you), you're crap out of luck. All of your belongings must go in the overhead bin when you sit in those seats.
* Change kiddo right before the flight takes off. When my son was tiny, I'd do it on the seat as soon as we got on. When we was in pull-ups, we'd go to the bathroom, even if it wasn't that full. Now, we take a trip regardless of the urge.
* Hands full? If you have mucho stuff when you land and no one's around right away to help, grab one of those push carts ($3-5), pile everything on it including the folded stroller, and put him in the front basket. He'll like it.
* Makeshift pillow. Bring something (sweater, baby blanket, jacket) to place under her head when she falls asleep, or to cover her if she’s cold. Those airline blankets and pillows are a commodity nowadays.
* Think the worst. Say it with me now: he will be fussy, he will want to run around, he will poop outside the diaper (or lose his potty-training skills), he will throw up, the plane will be delayed. Just make sure you're mentally and physically prepared and you should be fine.
* Throw out all morals. If my truly doesn't sit still on the plane, I break all of my child rearing rules and just bribe him so he's good for the 2-3 hours. It’s better than the nasty stares.

Get your car seat cover here.

Dr. Ty
From the GAL Blog
www.getalifecampaign.com

Carrie Fever - the plague of the friendless?

2008-06-09T01:30:00.001-04:00

It's funny.

First, I posted my billboard advertisement for women friends like Carrie, Samantha, Charlotte, and Miranda in my February post: Has Sex And The City Misled Us?

Then, I chronicled our freedom-filled, fun-filled SATC themed weekend in Chicago (not even a week ago -- where did the time go??), complete with pics of the crowds of women dressed to the 'nines and in groups of no less than 4 (of course) lined up to see our favorite GALs on the big screen.

Now, Irene S. Levine writes to her graduating readers to hold on to their friends: "the gift that keeps on giving," and uses us poor souls (SATC movie flockers) as an example of how women don't have enough good friends (Thanks a lot, Irene!). But, despite my bruised ego, her tips do include solid advice:

Make yourself a promise to keep up with your school chums---especially the ones with whom you have been able to share both happiness and heartbreaks. As you age and life becomes more complex and demanding, you'll realize that you have given yourself the most wonderful treasure. A few of the basics:

1) Always make friendship a priority (right up there after family). If you need a rationale to convince you, here it is: Research shows that social support and close friendships are linked to improved health and emotional well-being.

2) Get rid of toxic friendships that are consistently negative and emotionally draining. We all have one or two gal pals that are annoying to be with, people we feel ambivalent about and who probably feel ambivalent about us. Just let go of them.

3) Find any excuse to create rituals to stay in touch with the good friends. It shouldn't be a one-time affair. Make a plan to get together every month or at least several times a year. It can be on milestone birthdays or periodic girlfriend getaway jaunts. Or even the opening of a long-awaited chick flick!

4) In-between, use every way possible to stay connected via cell phones, Blackberries, and old-fashioned letters until the next time your see each other.

Female graduates: Congratulations---Go forth with your friends!

We actually had a similar discussion during our trip -- which friends are more valuable to us: the ones we've known forever and who remember our unrefined selves (braces, horrible fashion sense, deadbeat boyfriends), or the new friends whose lives may be more similar to our current ones?

The vote was mixed, but we agreed, there is merit in both types of friendships. You can certainly outgrow old friends, and you never want to be stagnant, but it's nice to remember the old times. Sometimes, it's just what I need when I feel life is getting too complicated -- go home, and trade silly, boy crazy stories with my high school friends, and feel more grounded.

However, if you're the first of your friends to get married or have a kid or advance your career, it can be lonely. And that's where the new friends come in (or, if your childhood friend develops a nasty habit or a taste for backstabbing -- enter the replacements).

If you're one of the lucky ones who has an old friend who still loves you despite your younger self, and has a life similar to the older you (career, relationship, family, interests), keep that friendship in a choke hold! -- and count your blessings.

My Rutbreakers style find: Like.com, where you can find outfits based on style and color across a bunch of different stores. Check it out!

Dr. Ty
From the GAL Blog
www.getalifecampaign.com

Rutbreakers #2: Wanna get made up?

2008-06-08T10:30:00.000-04:00

I admit, I don't wear makeup too often. I was 26 before I found a foundation that actually matched my skin AND covered my acne scars (rather than made me someone else's complexion).

At 24, working for a news station and putting together my resume tape, I found myself in front of a camera often, blemishes and all. I broke down and took the plunge, purchasing a powder foundation from Walgreens - CoverGirl - and it did the trick, sometimes.

Two years later, I went to the MAC counter at the mall before my med school graduation photos. The makeup artist said she had this great matte foundation perfect for photos, in liquid! I almost swatted the sponge out of her hand. I didn't want to be one of those women whose foundation you just wanted to chisel off piece by piece. Or whose heads didn't match their necks. But, I gave in, and it worked perfectly.

Well, that's the last time I bought foundation (over 2 years ago), and it's the same bottle I carry today. That should tell you how often I wear makeup.

However, on certain days I think it adds the pizazz your look demands. Just please take care of the skin underneath: drink water, moisturize, and wipe the gook off before you go to sleep. For makeup to look good, it needs a healthy palette.

I offer you the same crash course on eye makeup (my favorite kind of makeup) that I used to bring myself up to speed. The key is really to experiment and see what you like. Snap a digital photo if no one's around to give you an honest opinion.
Bobbi Brown's Guide to Eye Makeup

If it's been a while since you colored your face, please check out these NO-NOs:
Bobbi Brown's Makeup Misdemeanors
6 Common Eye Makeup Mistakes

Has the best colors, especially for diverse skin colors.
MAC Cosmetics

Any daring GALs wanna post a pic of your latest eye design?

Dr. Ty
From the GAL Blog
www.getalifecampaign.com

Rutbreakers #1: Frumpy v. Budget

2008-06-07T11:00:00.006-04:00

I hate shopping (I know I probably lost half of my readership just with that line).

Sorry, I do. It's the lines, the congestion, unhelpful sales associates, and the STRESS of trying to find THE perfect outfit because I know I can't afford TEN outfits (Let's not even talk about trying to find clothes that fit women with curves without gapping, sagging or falling off).

I do like nice, new things. If only I could have a personal shopper with my exact proportions... (dreamily jotting that on my to do list)

Anyway. In my primary profession, style and fashion does not win you brownie points, nor does it help you do your job. Sometimes, it can even get in the way or leave you with a hefty dry cleaning bill. So, we wear scrubs. Some women look great in them, as if they were tailored to their physique. Me? Not a chance.

So, in my efforts to fight my most recent rut, I have vowed to start dressing like an adult (a cute adult) and leave my scrubs (which look like PJ's on me) at home as much as I can.

That sounds great except for one thing: I'm BROKE. If I wasn't broke, the new car has now made me broke. And most of my clothes either don't fit (too big or too small), are out of style, or have rips/tears/stains.

There's a light at the end of the tunnel --

Sarah Jessica Parker launched a line called Bitten at Steve And Barry's. Are you ready for this? Everything in the store is $8.98 and under. Yes, as in less than NINE bucks. Pants, blouses, shoes, accessories, the whole nine. If you don't like SJP's line, there are others in the store.
TIP: If you don't like what your closest S&B's has, try checking others. I have been in two so far and the selections varied greatly.

I was just so happy to find NON-frumpy clothes at prices that didn't knock me back into the rut off of buyers' remorse. I didn't know what to do with myself.

Target also has a few designers at affordable prices (and you don't have to step foot in the store). Let's not forget the oldies but goodies: Forever21, H&M.

Gone are the days of having to bankrupt yourself to be stylish. Just in time.

Dr. Ty
From the GAL Blog
www.getalifecampaign.com

I vow to no longer be a hot mess...

2008-06-06T20:08:00.002-04:00

... well, at least until this weekend is over.

SIDE NOTE: Leave it to someone to actually DEFINE "hot mess." Numbers 1 through 3 are definitely applicable. Number 4... well, we all know I call that bubbleguts. Now, back to my rant...

A week before the Chicago girls' trip, a strange thing happened. I was preparing to lock myself in my apartment for three days (over Memorial Day weekend), turn off all ringers, clean the house from bottom to top, watch girly movies, light a bunch of candles, drink wine, and shut out the world. I got up that Saturday, and the sun was shining through a crack where I hadn't pulled the shade all the way. Brightly. I opened the front door and was met with a gust of warm, humid air. And, I actually had to squint.

I did an about-face toward my apartment and the dark, dimmed cave (all curtains drawn tightly) didn't seem as good an idea as it had all week. I packed a weekend bag and jumped into my truck, leaving the messy house (and a pile of laundry filled with hospital scrubs) behind.

I drove down to NYC, went out to a party that I had been resisting going to (because I was stuck in a rut and wanted to be ALONE), and had a cool time. It was nice having a reason to dress up, do my hair, put on some HEELS.

I realized that I didn't need more alone time. I needed more fun, socializing time with fun people. And what perfect timing? The Chicago trip was coming up. I was SO happy I hadn't canceled that. I definitely thought about it -- especially those days when the idea of having to talk to anyone was exhausting.

I also came back from the weekend vowing to fight the urge to wear scrubs (which just makes me feel frumpy), and actually put on real clothes, at minimum some mascara, and cute shoes. In the last two weeks, I've been spotted in scrubs only twice so far (hey, I'm working on it).
One was today, because I chose between pulling out nice clothes or getting my hair done. I chose the latter. The other was Tuesday, the day that I spent six hours on the phone because the rental car that I got on Monday -- to replace the brand new car whose engine failed -- got into an accident, and it was turning into a logistical nightmare. I know. I was dangling on the edge of falling back into the rut. But, I fought it by telling myself that it could be a lot worse. I also took a nice walk outside in the sun...

But, I kept feeling like, MAN I just had a great girls' trip. Can I PLEASE enjoy it for longer than the plane ride home?

A wise person said to me (on Tuesday as a matter of fact), that anyone can be happy on vacation. But, being happy in adversity is the real accomplishment.

So there: I vow to find happiness despite adversity (only if the universe stops putting so many roadblocks in my way!) Just kiddin'.

Dr. Ty
From the GAL Blog
www.getalifecampaign.com