What's your '09 motto? Mine is simple as can be.

Between facebook, twitter, and various blogs, I can't help but see resolution after resolution for 2009. I do have a few of my own, and much like everyone else, it's hit or miss whether I will still remember those vows come December 31.

But, this year, I am trying something different. I'm creating a motto for myself -- a theme, a niche, a style, so to speak.

My motto for 2009 is SIMPLICITY.

Those who followed the GAL blog last year know that I recently fell head first into a rut. It was partially my own fault, but it was such an eye opener. For once, I felt like someone turned the stage lights on, and all the "stuff" I plowed through and busied myself with suddenly seemed insignificant.

I pledged to turn down the volume (and pace)... to peel away all unnecessary things in life that drained me... and to reclaim my time and my sanity.

So far, I:

• Figured out the life I want (in all aspects, not just work) and decided to only do things that get me there.
• Saying "no" or "absolutely not" to anything that doesn't meet the criteria in the first bullet.
• Realized the person I have to say "no" to most often is myself.
  
• Reassessed what I wanted out of work, and where work falls on my list of priorities.
  
• Got over the fear of addressing my work desires.
• Got over the fear of leaving work if staying meant putting work above family and my life.
• Simplified many of my relationships across the board, and ignited those that actually uplift, humor, educate, inspire, or encourage.
• Scratched many, many things off the to do list and said to h&!! with those things.
• Became physically active again, ultimately dropping 12 pounds over 2 months.
• Stopped moving at lightening speed and learned to enjoy the feeling of sitting still for longer than 0.5 seconds (which meant, at times, not blogging).
  

For once in a long time I feel at peace. I feel more at peace than when I first wrote, "The Get A Life Campaign." I had allowed the book promotion to eat up all the free time I'd created. Then, I went back to work in medicine. And so goes the story. But, enough about me...

What is YOUR motto for 2009?

No more items added to your to do list, more rules you know you'll break, more crap to stress over. Where's your head this year? What's your theme (or theme music) for the Oh-nine? I want to know...

While you think, enjoy this song, entitled "A Song of Simplicity" by piano artist, Elijah Bossenbroek:






Dr. Ty
From the GAL Blog
www.getalifecampaign.com
Follow me on Twitter: @doctorty
Add our facebook fan page

From narcoleptic to insomniac

For the 4th night in a row, I can't fall asleep before 2am.

I'm used to being an insomniac... I can remember laying in bed as early as grammar school, watching the sun rise without so much as a wink of sleep all night.

But, my surgical ICU schedule last month made it very easy to fall asleep. Working 30 hours virtually every other day, with half days of work in between... not to mention picking up the munchkin by 6pm during the other two days. No sleep issues then.

Once the adrenaline of that schedule wore off, I crashed even harder. I finished my bid 2 days before my birthday. Purposely avoiding anything requiring major planning, a quiet weekend in some random town in New Hampshire sounded wonderful. Too bad my weekend is a blur of naps, food poisoning, and more naps.

The nice gazebo overlooking the inn's garden? Admired it through the backs of my eyelids. The boat cruise along Portsmouth Harbor and the Isles of Shoales? Snoozed. Any beautiful, quiet, relaxing moment? NAP time! I couldn't fight those heavy lids to save my life. Hours of my life gone, with only periodic awakenings filled with guilt about sleeping my birthday weekend away.


Oh well. It was relaxing.

So, I must have used up all of my sleep hours for the rest of the year. Because, now I'm struggling.

Maybe I need a little more narcoleptic New Hampshire in my life.

My favorite pic from the weekend...
found on the side of a random back road with no humans in site:

In case you can't see, it says: "Lettuce $1.00"

I definitely need more New Hampshire in my life.


Dr. Ty
From the GAL Blog
www.getalifecampaign.com

More things I don't have time for...

Why is it that when you have a "day off," you spend it with timesuckers (like various customer service agents just to fix one simple issue_?

My initial issue: My Sprint Treo 700p wouldn't charge without hanging the phone upside down or suspending the cord at just the right angle (aka "jimmying it").

The solution: Call Sprint. Not only have I paid monthly for that Sprint phone insurance for the last 10 years... the phone is within warranty.

What I did: Instead of calling the insurance as usual, I used the Sprint Self-service ONLINE replacement form (advertised as "save time").

What happened: The Treo 700p was out of stock, so a Palm Centro arrived. With no battery or charger.

What I did: Called Sprint to ask them if this was some sort of sick joke (nicely, of course).

What happened: A nice, clueless representative had no idea that this self-service option existed, and didn't know who sent me the phone. So she couldn't get them to get me a battery. She went away for some time, did some research and promised that she'd call me back after she ordered my new battery. She never called.

What came in the mail: Not one, not two, but THREE Sprint boxes!



What was inside said boxes: Yes, more phones WITHOUT batteries!


To make a long story short... after 7 hours of one-on-one quality time with various Sprint representatives, being transferred to literally every department within Sprint, coupled with many expressions of "I'm not sure how this happened," or "I don't know how to get you a battery," "I still can't figure out who sent you all these phones," or, "Of course ma'am, please hold..." followed by a click, hold music, and a new, unsuspecting person... I found two helpful people. Just two. Out of at least 25 people. Seriously.

The first conferenced me with accessory sales to purchase the battery and charger and immediately credited my account for it. HOWEVER, the order that arrived included:

TWO chargers, and ZERO batteries!
(See earlier comment about sick joke)

In case I lost you, here's the tally at this point: Nine days later... FOUR replacement phones, TWO chargers, ONE cover to fit the extended battery... wait... what battery? That's right: STILL, no battery.

More hours of wasted time later, after being deliberately hung up on by a very friendly associate, after having my pleads for a supervisor repeatedly ignored because EVERY associate thinks she or he can handle this (for some reason) complicated situation.... again, I find someone who has a brain inside his skull and figures out a way to send me the product I ordered. Thanks M.J.!

So today, for the first time since the order was first placed on July 22nd, I have a functional cell phone.

(For brevity, I left out that M.J. sent the new order to the wrong address, but in his defense, he had UPS redirect it to the right one 5 minutes after I called him. It arrived on Monday. But, Sprint was upgrading their system all day Monday, so I had to wait until Tuesday to activate it).

I'm convinced it's me. It has to be. This is the story of my life.

I am a walking customer service nightmare.


Dr. Ty
From the GAL Blog
www.getalifecampaign.com

The Art of Color

It's a proven fact that bright or soothing colors in a room can brighten your mood -- well, today, my proposition is that COLORING brightens your mood.

Even if you are childless, get out your watercolors or crayons and get to work! After a while, it becomes mindless, and relaxing. I think it's akin to meditating in some ways. All of your other senses are turned off and it's just you and the decision between aquamarine and turquoise.

One of my closest girlfriends and I used to buy coloring books in college when we were stressed out. It seemed goofy at the time, but maybe we were on to something.

For Father's Day, the lil' man and I made a watercolor Picasso as a present, and I really did feel calmer... I'll be looking out for your Picassos soon!



Dr. Ty
From the GAL Blog
www.getalifecampaign.com

Does customer service still exist?

The last thing I ever want to do with my last nugget of free time is fight with customer service. I feel like it's all I do nowadays between the new car, the car accident, and Sprint's auto debit snafu that resulted in multiple bank fees.

Yesterday, all I wanted was to pick up my license plates and ask a few questions -- that's it. This week alone, according to my call log, I called the dealership a total of 14 times. Most of those calls, I was directly transferred into someone's voice mail. They were nice enough to vary in whose voice mail boxes I landed. I kept calling back to possibly find someone with a pulse to answer my simple questions (of course, the operator is in a different building, so she doesn't know who's here or not.... please hold. click. ring. automated voice mail).

Now, I'm on a first-name basis with operators Karen and Cory (What's up guys? I miss you already), and it still got me nowhere. I missed one call from Mr. Salesman. Called right back. Left voice mail. Never heard a peep.

Clearly, I ignored my own rule #4 in "How Busy Women Can Stop Losing Money," and really should have just asked to speak to the manager. In my defense, I was trying not to be so mean and pushy, thinking if I could just reach lifeforms on the other end, the problem was really easy to solve.

Well, today, I got a manager -- the manager -- on the phone and he wasn't interested in my frustrating week in the least. In fact, he explained how terribly busy he was, and he'd call me back in 15 minutes. Fifteen turned into 45 and, fed up, I asked my mom to go in person and pick up the goods while I was at work. After he handed them over, she informed him that I still have not had my questions answered. He (again) said he didn't have time. He had customers. He'd call me in 15 minutes.


An hour later he called. He wasn't friendly. But, by then, I had already opened the Purchase and Delivery Satisfaction Survey email in my inbox (vengeance!) so my anger had decreased. I reiterated my frustrations on the phone, asked my questions (one of which he couldn't answer) and then he offered me free service on the first maintenance. Thanks, bud. Too bad, I never want to do business with you again.

Seriously, don't do me any favors. How about just doing your job?

I don't get it.

If you don't like animals, don't become a vet. If you don't like talking to people, fielding complaints, making people feel satisfied, then guess what? Don't pick a career where you have to talk to people, field complaints, and make them feel satisfied. Am I missing something?

Speaking of car buying, I found this really detailed site on Top 10 Car Dealer Scams. The author sounds even more pissed off than I was today. So, try to take the information in context.

My favorite part came before the scam info:

Funny one liners salespeople like to use on you. Did they take the same sales training course?

• "You're stealing food from my baby's mouth"
• "Everybody pays this fee"
• "We're losing our shirt on this deal"
• "The web sites you got the prices from are wrong."
• "This car won't be here tomorrow"
• "The bank requires you to buy the extended warranty to get loan approval"
• "Do you want the car? What will it take to make you sign today?"

I highlighted the ones attempted on me in red.

Not to mention --

Mr. Salesman: Just think about how you'll feel in that car...

Me: You don't have to sell me the car. I like the car already. I want you to get this monthly payment down. I wanna talk numbers.

Mr. Salesman: Well, I don't sell numbers, I sell cars.

Genius. Is there a way to buy a new car and never ever have to talk to car salesmen again in life... ever? Let me know.

Is there a such thing as customer service nowadays? No one from the dealership even called any time in the last three weeks to see if I was happy with such a large purchase (If they had, they would have found out about the brand new engine going out on me). Ugh.

The most disgusting part, is that we waste precious ME time talking to these knuckleheads, then we're too pissed off to do anything constructive.

Sigh - I think I feel a lil' bit better now.


Dr. Ty
From the GAL Blog
www.getalifecampaign.com

Have you challenged yourself lately?

Challenges.

Show me a busy woman, and I'll show you a person who successfully meets challenges day in and day out. But, there are also days when those same women are worn and torn down by those challenges. Sometimes we can safety-pin the edges together, sometimes the rips are painfully apparent, and many times we're stronger for them. Either way -- after a while, even the toughest woman wants a break.

An appropriate break would be ten days on a remote island. But, sometimes, we take a break in our daily lives. It's called burnout. We start to shy away from anything that smells or tastes like more challenges in an effort to quiet our lives for a second (even if those challenges could bring something positive). Whether it's not pushing forward for that promotion, avoiding a dream career that has many naysayers, or confronting a situation that requires us to do so, we avoid it.

I have hit that point many times. In the last few months, I've seen it way more than I care to. But, I am starting to learn that while those breaks can be good, we have to be careful not to fall even farther into a rut. How can we do that? By challenging ourselves first.

NEWS: I am proud of myself today.

The last few months, I have been fighting terribly against the rut, trying to find happiness despite the fatigue, stress and emotional weight. Every stride I've made lately has gotten me one step closer, but not quite over the hump of funk.

So, on the plane to Orlando, I decided that if life was going to keep giving me challenges that stressed me out, I could give myself challenges that make me proud of myself. Not the grandiose what-will-I-be-when-I-grow-up challenges... small challenges. With short deadlines. And reasonable expectations.

Challenge 1: To blog seven consecutive days without fail.

I'm a writer. We write. That's what we do. But, every good writer knows that as much as we love to write, sometimes it's hard to do. Especially if your creativity is stifled by stress. I got tired of writing BLOG on the top of my to-do lists every week and hardly getting to it. So I committed, and from May 6 to May 15 (Ran Out O' Gas to Baby Planners), I blogged. And blogged. And blogged. I actually exceeded my expectations and blogged a total of 10 days straight.

The cool thing was... during my blog challenge, no matter how frustrating work or the personal life was, I felt like I had something to look forward to. Something that was mine. It was small and maybe minuscule in some folks' eyes. But, it was something that I could still pat myself on the back for. It's amazing how those pats can add up.

Challenge 2: To swim in the deep end of the pool.

As much as I love water, I can only swim well when I know I can touch the bottom of the pool (or ocean). Even if I never touch it for hours, I need to know it's there. Well, one of my 2008 resolutions is to learn how to sail, and to sail, you have to -- guess what? -- swim in deep water!

I refuse to let a fear, rather than a real lack of skill, keep me from something I might love, so into the 9-foot water I went last week. I dunked myself deep into the water and did nothing. To my surprise, I floated back to the top -- after doing nothing! So, I did it again and swam a little -- success again. I did it once more and swam from the 9 feet back to the shallow side. Clearly, I made it out alive. I can't say that my fear is completely gone, but at least I know if I freak out, I'll at least float to the top.

And now I can get on a yacht this summer.

Challenge 3: To meet new people with shared interests.

I know I talk to new people all day long. But, it's not the same. I still get nervous meeting new folks and by default get stuck in the circles I already have. Well, I went to a medical conference today where I knew no one. And it went surprisingly well. I met two docs who are practicing one of my fields of interest -- including one whom I had heard of, and planned to google his email address this week. Freaky how that worked out.

It sucked using my one day off to do more medical stuff, but it was worth it. I got to dress up in real clothes (a suit rather than scrubs) and put makeup on. I got to pick the brains of more seasoned physicians. I took Amtrak so I could read rather than drive for an hour each way, and made a dent in my Harry Potter (book 3, hush). And -- the most important -- met my 3rd challenge head on (despite threatening to back out the night before).

Now it's your turn!

What are your recent (public or secret) challenges? You don't have to tell your friends, but do tell your GAL pals! We wanna know. And if you don't have one. Make one. Um... like now. We're waiting...



Dr. Ty
From the GAL Blog
www.getalifecampaign.com

Ran Out O' Gas

I ran out of gas a couple of days ago... on the highway, no less. Maybe it's the $4/gallon I pay for gas on my SUV in CT. Maybe it's how quickly I burn gas during my 30-minute-each-way-commute this month. Could be. Or perhaps, I got in my car for days and days looking at the gas light, telling myself that I would be late (or later) if I stopped. Or, the times I got in the car, I convinced myself that if I could just make it to my destination I'd certainly get gas on the way back. On that particular day, the truth is, I had forgotten how many miles I'd driven since the light first appeared. I had forgotten how many times I'd cranked the ignition to see the lever on empty. With 20 minutes left to get my son, and annoying traffic right where I-91 meets I-95, I had to go for it.

Well, what happens when a car runs out of gas? It stops. First, I couldn't accelerate anymore (on the highway). That was scary enough. Then, the uh-oh lights came on in the display panel and I heard the engine stop. I threw it in neutral and coasted to the right shoulder and down the nearest exit, trying to use my momentum from the downward hill to get me around the corner and out of danger. Eghhhh, not quite. But, a very nice Comcast repairman (he must have been smiling on the inside, because his face was so not into it) pushed me the few feet I needed to to not get slammed by cars exiting from the ramp. A gas station just a block away (but too far to push), I begged to borrow the gas can, brought the Vue a sip of gas, cranked it, and filled the rest of the tank at the pump.

With my fiasco, I was only 15 minutes late picking my son up from school (I'd frantically called as soon as the engine went down).

While this snafoo was clearly indicative of how spent, rushed and time-famished I've been lately... the reality is that it is truly symbolic of my life right now.

Tyeese is out of gas.

I have worked 18 of the last 21 days, at least 50-80 hours/week. I have been getting up, getting dressed, going to work, seeing patients, coming home, cooking or dining out (more of the latter lately), picking/dropping off the munchkin to/from the sitter, cleaning up the house, attempting to sleep, dealing with tons of sadness, trying to roll with the punches as everything around me is changing-changing-changing. And for at least the last month, my personal gas light has been coming on as soon as my eyes pop open in the morning, and I have ignored it: I don't have time, I gotta get the munchkin dressed, I need to read up on that patient, I need to sleep/call my friends/do something fun. So I drove and drove and drove and drove myself: I can make it, I know I can. I'll fill up on the way back.. oops, I forgot. I'll stop when this is over... and alas, the gas tank runneth dry, and I am burned out.

Vacation is near, but something's got to give.

Dr. Ty
From the GAL Blog
www.getalifecampaign.com

15 Minutes (and the tub) Goes A Long Way...

Over the last year, I've found that certain things instantly calm me, no matter how riled up I am. I realized that I hate artificial light (from lightbulbs), so I started showering in complete darkness and just allowing my thoughts to focus on the water running against my skin. Then, I added candles, because the flicker from that tiny wick dancing along the wall is entrancing. Soon, I started soaking in the tub (tub + lights out + candle + various bubble baths). Later, came reading a book (or magazine) with extra candlelight to read by. Occasionally, there's a beverage involved -- either chamomile tea or a glass of wine. Last week, I brought a tray of snacks up. Today -- I plugged in my small radio. Things are getting dangerous now. I think I've created my own little oasis.

Whatever it takes to leave the crazy day behind, man. Even my son is getting used to my 15 minute candlelit soaks ("Mommmm-my, whatcha dooooing? You taking a baaaath?" from his bed... Me: "Go to bed!" Him: "Ooo-kay").

Today's 15 minutes have now turned into an hour (the week was especially bad). I'm still sitting in the bathroom, two candles burning, lights off (except for the light from the laptop) and with each minute, my crazy week is drifting into faint nothingness.

Too bad I have to work this weekend.

What's your quick (relaxing) 15-minute fix? ..that one thing that brings you back to center when life is just WAY too hectic?


Dr. Ty
From the GAL Blog
www.getalifecampaign.com